's not the first time Estinien and I have gotten into it over his tone. He doesn't mean to sound like a dick. Just does. Because he is one, like half the time.
You were right though. ... You didn't have to *say* it, but you were right.
atsushi will hear him "pffffft" and start snickering in his pod holy shit ]
Sneaky little shit! Would've never thought you had it in you. I don't mind. Can't say I'm the type to keep quiet, or keep that sort of thing unknown. Rather just put it out there. I wasn't going to let him get suspicious of you for no fucking reason. I woke up with one, too.
...He wasn't doing it on purpose, either. That's sort of our issue, anyway. I used to have the same problem with Percy too.
[ god. he tilts his head back in the pod, and atsushi can hear him laugh again, though it's more of a "ha ha that's a story" laugh than anything particularly humorous. ]
You mean how we met each other, or when we started getting along? One of those happened sooner than the other. Used to think he was the biggest prick in Exandria. Still kind of is, but he's our prick now, I guess.
We travel together. Met him in a prison where he was being falsely accused of a crime. Ended up breaking him out - our little gnome friend's a wordsmith, took on a role as his defense lawyer, even though we just broke him out anyway.
Think we got too much in common to get along perfectly, if that makes sense. Well. That, and he's fucking my sister.
[Me, remembering you are canon familiar and going :)
The small realm is mostly dark, with the only light coming from a set of stained glass windows. There's no visible furniture in the room, and in fact the only detail that can be seen is that there is some kind of wood floor here.
Atsushi is sitting in the center of the lit up area, using what little light is available to scribble something into a book. He seems pretty focused on it, writing on and on without taking a break. Though when Vax comes by he'll look up to him.]
... the stained glass is nice, actually. it feels like duskmeadow. vax looks up at it, lets the colors sort of flicker across his face, settling in the moment before he even really announces his presence. as he makes his way over, vax's emotional vibes are... tired, melancholy, but steady. ]
...Hey, Soosh. [ he speaks quietly, in such a sacrosanct place. ] What're you working on?
[Atsushi also feels tired, but also lowkey anxious and like the nerves of 'tomorrow is coming' and 'I don't have much time left' are nipping at the back of his mind. It's the focus on his writing that's keeping him from losing it, really.]
Something I thought I would have more time to finish.
[He admits that with a sigh.]
It's harder to write when a deadline is coming up, you know? There's so much I wanted to put in here, but I can't put my thoughts together enough to get even half of it down.
[The current place he's open to has one completed page and one page he's still writing on. The completed side is talking about books and listing some of his favorite genres of writing, as a way to introduce whoever's going to end up reading it to more books to read in the future. The other side has a list labeled as "Foods to Try" and lists the names of several dishes. This side is only partially done.]
honestly, the fondness just increases a little more, though there's a deep stab of sorrow underneath it that could only be related to vin. he's so fucking worried - and he knows, how badly loss hurts her. how badly this specific loss is going to kill her.
however, he's not going to say that out loud. so, anyway. you think he didn't notice this already? you think he did not?
... kid's about to die, so it's not like vax can threaten him, really, so. ]
...Think she'll like that, a lot. [ ... ]
Have you told her? [ and he is not talking about the book. ]
[It's a guidebook of 'things to do when your world is saved', he hopes she likes it.
He does go a bit awkward at that question though.]
N-no...it doesn't really seem like a good thing to do now anyway.
[There is an undercurrent of self-loathing there too. 'There's no point in ever admitting to a crush, because there's no way anyone would like me back'. That's a very distinct kind of sorrow Atsushi has been grappling with these last few weeks.]
...Look. I've been in that situation, before. Even - even when I did it, it didn't work out right away. [ but it did, eventually, is the obvious implication there. ] Even if she didn't return the feeling, I knew - if I was going to fucking die, if we were going to fucking die, I couldn't go without letting her know. Even if we lived, and she didn't return the feeling, that didn't matter. None of it changed the fact that I loved the person I told.
[ his emotions are - complicated. warm, but there's grief, too. worry, for atsushi. a little frustration and irritation, but it's mostly muffled under that melancholy tired.
he reaches up and scrubs his hand over his face. ]
... Not that it fucking matters, I think you could see that she's into you from space. [ the emotion is jesus fucking christ i can't believe i'm having this conversation with you right now ] Get out of your own head and have a little confidence, Soosh! Fuck.
[The hilarious thing is that this is like the third time he's had this conversation in some form, but nobody has said the magic words to kick Atsushi out of his anxiety spiral when it comes to 'Vin' and 'feelings'.]
...she is? You're sure?
[Atsushi is a idiot who wears his heart on his sleeve and can't even hide the flip-flop of hope in his stomach there. He gains crushes so easily but he shoves them all away because he just assumes that everybody is interested in someone else and couldn't possibly like him. He's too pessimistic and thinks that anything that might be a 'maybe she likes me' is actually just in his head and he'll be rejected and look like and idiot and feel like an idiot for ever thinking he could be more than just friends with someone.
But all it takes is someone confirming that yes, those feelings are mutual, and suddenly those doubts are (mostly) cleared away.]
he just reaches out and swats him in the back of the head, though it's not very hard at all. ]
Yes, you fucking doofus.
[ this is so hypocritical because vax is just as stupid about this ] So, say something about it while you still can. And talk to Ruby, while you're at it! Fuck.
[ at the bottom of the page, in his neat, slanted handwriting, smaller than atsushi's but still there, he adds: ]
No matter what happens, don't forget that you're loved. - Sly
[ for as much as he's a joker and a gremlin, vax is a big, soft baby on the inside. this little gesture means a lot to him, for vin, because he knows how hard this all is for her.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Week 1, Thursday
At some point when they're both not in the pods, Atsushi is kind of out of it but he'll hold up the stuffed black cat for Vax to see.]
Look, he came with us.
Week 1, Saturday
How long do you think we need to stay in here?
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Me, for-fucking-ever.
You... forever.
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I slept through the first time, so this time feels very long.
I guess we're pod-buddies now.
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Yeah.
Guess so.
... You did a good job today, y'know
That was hard.
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[He has to downplay his good actions, always.]
And thank you, for not making a big scene about all of 'that'.
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He doesn't mean to sound like a dick. Just does. Because he is one, like half the time.
You were right though.
... You didn't have to *say* it, but you were right.
[ he was feeling very protective :c ]
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So any time you feel like he's being a dick, just send him an angry message.
[Atsushi is absolutely suggesting it because that is what he does.]
I felt like I had to explain that you weren't being a dick on purpose to him though.
You meant well.
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atsushi will hear him "pffffft" and start snickering in his pod holy shit ]
Sneaky little shit! Would've never thought you had it in you.
I don't mind. Can't say I'm the type to keep quiet, or keep that sort of thing unknown.
Rather just put it out there. I wasn't going to let him get suspicious of you for no fucking reason.
I woke up with one, too.
...He wasn't doing it on purpose, either.
That's sort of our issue, anyway.
I used to have the same problem with Percy too.
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[Something something 'this twink really is a top'.]
Percy can be pretty straightforward, yes.
How did you two become friends?
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You mean how we met each other, or when we started getting along?
One of those happened sooner than the other.
Used to think he was the biggest prick in Exandria.
Still kind of is, but he's our prick now, I guess.
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[So long as Vax's fingies don't get tired from texting.]
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We travel together.
Met him in a prison where he was being falsely accused of a crime. Ended up breaking him out - our little gnome friend's a wordsmith, took on a role as his defense lawyer, even though we just broke him out anyway.
Think we got too much in common to get along perfectly, if that makes sense.
Well.
That, and he's fucking my sister.
[ dont just say that ]
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You really buried the lede there!
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What, they are, unfortunately
It's disgusting
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[Might as well explain why this is so shocking for him to learn.]
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he's like
hysterically laughing at atsushi's first text and this one comes in and he just fucking chokes and squawks, out loud, -]
What?!
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He cares alot about you!!!!
Dont laufh itsnot that funny!
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Oi you really think I want -- that's GROSS he's my BROTHER IN LAW, Sush
Two guys can't travel together for half a decade?! Fuck!
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Okay SORRY!
I dont know much about relationships so I just assumed!
But I wont assume again! Youre just brother in laws!
Week 4, Saturday
The small realm is mostly dark, with the only light coming from a set of stained glass windows. There's no visible furniture in the room, and in fact the only detail that can be seen is that there is some kind of wood floor here.
Atsushi is sitting in the center of the lit up area, using what little light is available to scribble something into a book. He seems pretty focused on it, writing on and on without taking a break. Though when Vax comes by he'll look up to him.]
Ah? Hello?
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... the stained glass is nice, actually. it feels like duskmeadow. vax looks up at it, lets the colors sort of flicker across his face, settling in the moment before he even really announces his presence. as he makes his way over, vax's emotional vibes are... tired, melancholy, but steady. ]
...Hey, Soosh. [ he speaks quietly, in such a sacrosanct place. ] What're you working on?
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Something I thought I would have more time to finish.
[He admits that with a sigh.]
It's harder to write when a deadline is coming up, you know? There's so much I wanted to put in here, but I can't put my thoughts together enough to get even half of it down.
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he comes and sits down cross legged across from him. ]
A story? [ peering... there's some curiosity there. ]
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[The current place he's open to has one completed page and one page he's still writing on. The completed side is talking about books and listing some of his favorite genres of writing, as a way to introduce whoever's going to end up reading it to more books to read in the future. The other side has a list labeled as "Foods to Try" and lists the names of several dishes. This side is only partially done.]
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he thinks, maybe, he can guess who it might be for, but. ]
...For who? If you don't mind me asking.
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[Yep. There's no hiding that massive crush he has, not during emotionshare week. Guess who is also into one of your sisters, Vax.]
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honestly, the fondness just increases a little more, though there's a deep stab of sorrow underneath it that could only be related to vin. he's so fucking worried - and he knows, how badly loss hurts her. how badly this specific loss is going to kill her.
however, he's not going to say that out loud. so, anyway. you think he didn't notice this already? you think he did not?
... kid's about to die, so it's not like vax can threaten him, really, so. ]
...Think she'll like that, a lot. [ ... ]
Have you told her? [ and he is not talking about the book. ]
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[It's a guidebook of 'things to do when your world is saved', he hopes she likes it.
He does go a bit awkward at that question though.]
N-no...it doesn't really seem like a good thing to do now anyway.
[There is an undercurrent of self-loathing there too. 'There's no point in ever admitting to a crush, because there's no way anyone would like me back'. That's a very distinct kind of sorrow Atsushi has been grappling with these last few weeks.]
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well, okay. this gets a different emotion, one that feels very uh.
unhappy actually. maybe a vibe closer to that shovel tag, actually, though it's more like fucking really ]
Quit that. [ this is just addressing that self-loathing undercurrent, first, but -] Listen to me.
[ just very bluntly: ] If you're gonna die tomorrow, do you want to die regretting that you didn't say anything?
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I...don't even know if she likes me back.
[He says, even though they've spent the entire week being warm and bubbly around each other.]
Isn't it selfish to just dump my feelings on her like that?
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mid battle confession to keyleth
frowns. ]
...Look. I've been in that situation, before. Even - even when I did it, it didn't work out right away. [ but it did, eventually, is the obvious implication there. ] Even if she didn't return the feeling, I knew - if I was going to fucking die, if we were going to fucking die, I couldn't go without letting her know. Even if we lived, and she didn't return the feeling, that didn't matter. None of it changed the fact that I loved the person I told.
[ his emotions are - complicated. warm, but there's grief, too. worry, for atsushi. a little frustration and irritation, but it's mostly muffled under that melancholy tired.
he reaches up and scrubs his hand over his face. ]
... Not that it fucking matters, I think you could see that she's into you from space. [ the emotion is jesus fucking christ i can't believe i'm having this conversation with you right now ] Get out of your own head and have a little confidence, Soosh! Fuck.
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...she is? You're sure?
[Atsushi is a idiot who wears his heart on his sleeve and can't even hide the flip-flop of hope in his stomach there. He gains crushes so easily but he shoves them all away because he just assumes that everybody is interested in someone else and couldn't possibly like him. He's too pessimistic and thinks that anything that might be a 'maybe she likes me' is actually just in his head and he'll be rejected and look like and idiot and feel like an idiot for ever thinking he could be more than just friends with someone.
But all it takes is someone confirming that yes, those feelings are mutual, and suddenly those doubts are (mostly) cleared away.]
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he just reaches out and swats him in the back of the head, though it's not very hard at all. ]
Yes, you fucking doofus.
[ this is so hypocritical because vax is just as stupid about this ] So, say something about it while you still can. And talk to Ruby, while you're at it! Fuck.
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Ruby likes Vin too?! I-I can't say anything, they should have each other then!
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And you. You all like each other. It's not hard.
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We're all idiots.
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he claps him on the shoulder ]
Sure are.
[ very, very affectionate ]
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Immediately flipping to the next page in the book and scribbling the following down:]
TALK TO RUBY!
SHE LIKES YOU!
AND ME TOO I GUESS BUT TALK TO HER!
[Maybe that will make Vruby real too.]
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he reaches out, like - snickering, a little, laughing as he comes to sit next to him. ]
Can I see?
[ gesturing for the pen. ]
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Don't write anything rude okay?
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No matter what happens, don't forget that you're loved. - Sly
[ for as much as he's a joker and a gremlin, vax is a big, soft baby on the inside. this little gesture means a lot to him, for vin, because he knows how hard this all is for her.
he hands the pen back and book back. ]
There.
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She might need a nudge later, think you can do that?
[Since they're all idiots and all.]